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My GirlfriendWhen I first met you
I did not know
That you had captured
Wanting to ask you out
Only to find
You were already taken
We became friends
You introduced me
To a friend
We also became friends
She was taken too
You and I
We hung out often
I was invited to your wedding
An escort to your friend
Her husband could not go
The night before
You on the couch bed
Me in my bed
You beside me
So were you
We continue to hang out
I have my first time
With another girl
You are more touchy
I can tell
You have been drinking
You try to kiss me
You poke me
I slide away
We end up
Almost in the kitchen
Our heads collide
You try to kiss me
I turn away
I want to kiss you
Your husband is there
You like me
He goes outside for a smoke
You try to kiss me again
To kiss you
I keep thinking
Will he walk in
Will he be mad
I cant believe
That you liked me too
Discovering Who I amI have been doing a lot of thinking this past week about a number of things but mainly about who I am. I am a rock chick, a country girl, someone who will listen, someone you can have crazy fun with because you know everyone is crazy even if they do not admit it. I am a 24 year old white girl, who is 5' 3" an average build. I have blue eyes, wear contacts, my hair is dirty blond. I like anime/manga, I like to sing, read, write and draw. I am all this and more. To most who know me I am a girl and I like guys. That is not a lie but that is not the whole truth either. I am a girl who likes guys but I am also a girl who likes girls. Saying I am straight is not correct although that is what I commonly refer to myself as. Yet saying I am lesbian is not entirely true either. It took awhile for me to understand but I like both guys and girls.
I never thought about it until now but like most little girls I had Barbies. I had one or maybe two Ken dolls but the rest were all Barbie. I do not reme
I Miss YouI loved you from the moment I met you.
Yeah I loved you then even if I did not realize it yet.
I want you to be the one I end up with.
We have tried so many times to be together.
Right when we think things are finally coming together.
There is something there pulling us part.
You have never said you did not love me.
Well you did once but you were frustrated.
You know how much I love you.
I know sometimes I say it too much.
I get scared when you do not say it back.
You know like you used to all the time.
I know you have a lot on your mind right now.
I have got a lot on my mind too.
Your problems are bigger than mine.
I want to be there to support you.
I want to wait for you but maybe you are right.
We are in two separate states now.
There are two states separating us.
I know we would be together if you were here.
Hell we were even talking about getting our own place.
I loved you then and I will love you forever.
I truly believe I loved you before I knew you.
Maybe you are right.
KnowingI love you
Knowing you belong to another
If he ever hurts you
Know you can come to me
I pray he never does
My heart aches for you
Most of the time I feel in silence
You have shown me that I am not alone
It pains me to know you hurt
Knowing I am helpless
Feeling I am part of the cause
Longing to touch and hold you
Wondering if I should walk away
Causing you to hate me to make things easier
Unable to do so knowing it would hurt you
Knowing it would hurt me
Wanting only to make you smile
Feeling fate brought us together
Only to laugh at me knowing it was too late
Even still thought each day is another moment
I cherish not regretting meeting you
Life never turns out as we plan
Knowing you belong to another
You love me
First Senshi: Sailor MoonThere was a legend known to all Lunarians of a silver crystal with untold powers. Whoever was able to find this crystal and wield its power would become the ruler of the Moon and be able to defeat Chaos and bring order to the galaxy. Things are never simple with legends and the silver crystal was no exception.
Only a woman could wield the power of the legendary silver crystal meaning the ruler of the Moon would be a woman, which did not sit well with the elders of the clan. Once the crystal was in the possession of its rightful owner the woman could only bear one child and that child would be a daughter. Finally, using the crystal to its fullest power would mean certain death for the wielder.
Anyone could hold the silver crystal but it would only react with the rightful owner. This meant one could pass the legendary crystal all their life and never know it.
Day of SilenceThe Day of Silence was on April 25th, 2008. It is a day for the Lesbian Gay Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) community to stand up for themselves. I personally never took part in the Day of Silence because I was so in the closet that I knew nothing of the lgbt community except they had a group called Spectrum on college campuses. I have only recently started to be proud of who I am and starting to be my true self. No I am not completely out of the closet but I am out to my parents and some of my friends. No one is ever really completely out because every new person you meet in your life you have to make the decision to tell them or not tell them about your orientation.
My experience with the Day of Silence was back in 2001 even though then I did not know it was called the Day of Silence or what was going on. I remember one of my friends who was bi came to school wearing a shirt that said something like I am not talking today. I thought oohh this should be fun to try and get her to talk
Dark Senshi Chapter 10Chapter 10: Dark Chibi Moon
This time it was not a dream of the past but a dream about a young girl that looked like Usagi yet did not look like her. The girl that stood before her had long pink hair like Usagis but was a darker shade of pink and tipped with black at the ends. The girls dress looked like Usagis dress but was a darker shade of pink and where it should have been trimmed in gold was trimmed in black.
You look like me yet you are not me. You look to different and not old enough to be Black Lady, said Usagi.
When the girl spoke Usagi could not believe what she heard as the voice that come out of the girls mouth was her own.
Why Usagi dont you recognize yourself? asked the girl mockingly. I am you, she continued, but I am more powerful than you or even Black Lady. When Wiseman controlled you as a young girl and brought forth Black Lady I thought it was finally my chance to be free and in control.
Princess Lady Serenity was no longer called Small Lady but now insisted on being called Usagi. She was going to marry Helios at some point in the future and Neo Queen Serenity had transferred the power of Sailor Moon from herself to her daughter. Now that the power of Sailor Moon had been transferred to Usagi she was no longer Eternal Sailor Chibi Moon but was now Neo Sailor Moon defender of 30th Century Crystal Tokyo. She had her own guardians, the Amazon Quartet, to help her plus the original Senshi still had their powers if they were ever needed.
All the Inner Senshi had married by Usagis fifth birthday. After a few years Rei finally quit being stubborn and gave in to Jadeite. They started dating and finally got married. Hotaru started dating Perle after Usagi came back to the 30th Century after the battle with the Dark Senshi. Eventually Hotaru married Perle with Haruka giving Hotaru away, Usagi was Hotarus Maid of Honor, Helios married them, and the res
Dark Senshi Chapter 03Chapter 03: Dark Jupiter
Makoto was walking back to her apartment thinking about what Serenity had told her and the others about her memories of Dark Moon. When Makoto got to her apartment and started to unlock the door, she noticed a rose at her feet with a letter. The rose was strange because it was almost black in color but she could tell it was a deep green. First Makoto picked up the letter as it was lying on top and opened it.
"Its me!" was all that was written on the card.
This puzzled Makoto because the handwriting looks strangely similar to hers. Then she bent down to pick up the rose and as soon as she touched the rose, a wave of dark lighting crackled around her and Makoto passed out.
Makoto was Princess Jupiter from her past life in the Silver Millennium. She was walking in the gardens behind the palace. Wondering through the roses, she enjoyed strolling in the rose beds that bloomed in the vast garden using the time to think. The roses on Jupiter were differen
She's only a crushI know I like her
and I know that I shouldn't
she's new, it's a phase;
I tried to stop but I couldn't.
I reread her messages
looking for signs
But her hearts and xo's
mean different than mine
She's straight, I'm not
I know that much
I can do this, I can do this;
it's only a crush
we have to stay friends
because I've done this before;
I know how it ends
Down! You damn butterflies
stop that sick feeling.
She walks in the room
and my mood hits the ceiling
What's wrong with me, damn it
Why her, why now?
This secret I'm holding
weighs ten thousand pounds
I make myself sick,
I've no control of my eyes
to look at her I see
an inevitable goodbye
Her touches are just touches
her words are just words
I have it through my head,
but then why does it hurt?
Stop, I must stop.
Brain, shut up.
It can't mean that much
she's only a crush.
Genders asideI'm in love with a girl, and it's nothing wrong
I'm love with this girl, with love so strong
I'll kiss her in public, because the world needs to know
that this is right, let them know what they don't.
I'm in love with girls, and some boys too
gender shouldn't matter, a 'you' is a 'you'.
And lips will be lips, a kiss is a kiss
hearts will be broken, love will be missed.
Skin is still soft, looks are still tender
love is still love, regardless of gender.
And my colors are: rainbows and more
to be stuck in saturation is a life to abhor.
I follow my heart, wherever that leads
don't play the judge; you don't know me.
Whether chins have stubble, whether lips are chapped
If I love you, I love you - no matter what you have.
The last thing I learned is that I can't be afraid
fear drains out color; be how you're made.
Love who you want, or you won't love at all
I promise one thing; love's worth the fall.
Best Friends for the MomentWe were best friends, or at least I
Liked to think we were.
On any condition, I was the one
in our grade that knew her the
The only one she was close to.
I thought we were best friends because of that.
I told them so.
I admit, I thought she was pretty.
With her ice blue eyes
and long blonde hair,
I told them so.
I trusted them.
They were my good friends,
They accepted me
for what I was.
They told her,
told her about my dreams,
told her what I had
They expected her not to care.
We were friends,
she would accept me for
what I was.
The next day,
I got a letter.
"Stay away from me!"
Stoic.A breath I take safety's sake
This is the fate for which I cry
Through expedite I now awake
That but for virtue, I still lied
I weep for one so amorous
For now he is a world away
The victim of forsaken trust
The one I vowed not to betray
His death I feared and so I lied
I practiced sins he did abhor
I told the truth and then inside
He did so die in metaphor
I'm gone and yet to the past
I clutch on to his fate I set
He's done for, his line is cast
And I live endless in regret
Falling Between The LineMy mouth opened to speakwords
clung to the tip of my tongue,
praying to be released and capture the moment,
but your mouth denied such pleasure,
enticed my body with different sensations,
strangled my tongue so what I said was impossible
to decipher. Just a purr vibrating the back of my throat,
a moan captured in the chest,
light-headed, throbbing of the temples, to the point of calling it a migraine.
I'm sick. My mother even told me so.
As I counted down the days of the months,
the hours of the days, the minutes of the hours,
until the numbers became too
Die in my shoes?I had a friend tell me she would die in my shoes
She cant imagine living with my scars and broken heart
She told me I was so brave and strong and that she admires this
I just nod and smile, pretending those words comfort me
While my heart curses under my lungs
I wish I didnt have to be
And I murmur that its not that simple
And this is just another one of those things that happens to other people.
It used to be me who could look and say how brave the world is
It used to be me who admired all those survivors of tragedy, and I wished for their prestige
The respect that surviving such pains brings
I thought the admiration would be enough
Thats all I have now, it feels empty-broken-useless
I want the easy life, where I can ignorantly lie
I wouldnt be able to survive
Getting Over ItI saw her with you. It made me cringe,
The way she clung onto your arm
As if she had no limbs to support herself.
And you, your arm half flung
Over her shoulders, allowed it.
I wondered why.
Her hair is such a mess, she really
Does let herself go. Cant you see it?
Dont you know just how
unsuited everyone says you are?
Her fake giggles, playful push and shove,
All ticking boxes from some dating book,
Designed to induce you
To love her? Why her?
Why does she laugh so much?
You were never so amusing, and
She, I know, has no sense of humour.
I joked with her once. She flipped.
Shes paranoid too, suspicious,
Why else ask me about rumours
She spread about herself.
Like Id have anything to say about her.
You must be missing me now though,
Now that you two are apart.
So what did she have that I didnt?
You look at me. My heart.
Daddy's Little Girl
How come you claim to know me?
about the way I speak and think
about how I feel inside
You forgot who I am long ago
I'm not your little girl any more
she died so many, many years ago
in your arms and by your hands
I'm not who you think I am
I'm sure we might share some traits
even though I regret them each day
You won't ever see me as myself
as you're blindfolded by your own lies
There's no shred of sane in your mind
there's no sign of love of any kind
Daddy's girl let go so long ago of your hand
and she has given up on you.. on you as friend
Why do you still try to fix what you broke
you've mended, sawn and everything
but everything in the wrong way
Can't you see that it's only getting worse
You won't ever change, even for yourself
You don't know how others feel, by your hands
You forgot to love days and decades ago
You've forsaken my heart and all for all
You've shown me, no kept me from your paths
by fear, pain, agony, heartship and ache
but due to this my soul has ceased to break
UntitledWhen I think of you there is pain.
I know it is for the best.
That does not mean it does not hurt.
You said you loved me.
Did I love you?
Yes I think I did.
I still want to be with you.
I know I shouldn't,
but I do.
This is for the best.
I still see you in my dreams.
There is something I want.
Even more than to touch you.
I want our friendship to survive.
You were my friend first,
My lover second.
In my heart you will always be.
Keep in Touch!
scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More